Opposable Thumbs #1

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"Proud Flesh"
"Shit-Fuck-Piss Karate!"
"Chasing Soho"
"Burnt Umber"
"Wash-n-Dry"
"Minding Millie"
"Rubulad"
Writer/Artist: Dean Haspiel

"A Tribute to Dino!" Writer: Harvey Pekar
Artist/Editor: Josh Neufeld

Publisher: Jeff Mason/Alternative Comics

Plot: It's a collection of Billy Dogma creator Dean Haspiel's "Semi-Auto-Bio Comix": autobiographical stories for those who don't want to get sued. Featuring tales that have appeared in places like Keyhole and Expo 2000.

Intrigued by the an article on the series in Comic Shop News (There's the only time I'll ever use "intrigued" and CSN in the same sentence), I was glad to see that my store actually ordered the first issue of Dean Haspiel's series from Alternative Comics.

One of my favorite comics ever was Patricia Breen's Kiss and Tell. Ms. Breen was a Philadelphia area writer who self-published three issues of various autobiographical stories in 1996 and 1997. The book garnered quite some attention, and Jezebelle artist Steve Ellis worked on a few stories. In fact, the third issue of the series contained such a harrowing tale about the author's Catholic school years that it remains one of those stories I can never get out of my head, though I wish I could. The series gained attention from Sirius, and re-launched with a new issue #1 in '97- then the comic ground to a halt, and the series- and Ms. Breen- were never heard from in comics again.

Kiss and Tell was my introduction to the autobiographical comics genre, but only now have I found a book that I felt was as wickedly fun as Kiss and Tell: Dean Haspiel's Opposable Thumbs. Haspiel, like Breen, simply relates rather strange incidents and stories of his life, with a few facts changed. Most of the tales are ones of debauchery and drunken silliness- and they're all quite fun.

You can make some pretty interesting lemonade out of the lemons in your life, and that's just what Haspiel does in "Proud Flesh"- a sort of "Dean's Most Painful Physical Injuries" sure to shock and amaze. And unlike Rosie O'Donnell, Haspiel does not need to devote more than a page of his book to staph infections (Actually, Rosie's article was informative- until the celebrity testimonials- "Wow it hurts"?- thanks, Tom Hanks!).

Yet where there is comedy in injury there is also great tragedy, as evidenced by the 1999 short story. The story starts off cute with a tale of painted clowns- then suddenly grows deadly serious. There are mostly humorous tales in this book, but "Burnt Umber" reveals the pathos too.

Two of the more twisted stories in the book are an untitled story I've deemed "Wash-n-Dry" and the wonderfully titled "Shit-Piss-Fuck Karate." The latter is a tale of crack smoking gone kung fu. I've never seen the pain of drug addiction quite depicted the way it is in this story. It reminds me of a story someone once told me of one of his friends showing up beaten and bloody at his apartment...because yet another friend kicked the crap out of him. "Wash-n-Dry" is a Tale of Roommate Terror- one of the best I've ever read. Oh, you have to read this one to believe it.

In fact, a lot of these stories do what I think is best in autobiographical stories, from Breen to Harvey Pekar (who contributes an inside front cover gag) and others- it takes seemingly mundane incidents and turn them into entertainment. Haspiel's instincts lean towards broad comedy rather than insight, yet with "Burnt Umber" the serious side shows through.

If the book has a flaw, it's the artwork. This is the first book I've read by Haspiel, and while for the most part his artwork is quite good, in others it's inconsistent. I'm not sure what Haspiel was going for in "Minding Mille", which just looks ugly. The two-page strip "Chasing Soho" didn't look that good either. Overall, though, Haspiel's art is nice to look at.

As I've said before, this is the first time I've read work by Dean Haspiel, but it won't be the last. Opposable Thumbs is a very entertaining book for a book of reprints: check it out if you don't have all of the original stories or are looking for something different. I, myself, will be eagerly awaiting the next collection of tall tales from Dean Haspiel.

But I am never, EVER, going drinking with the guy.